Life-sized Barbie House Brings Protests From Feminists!
At the grand opening of a life-sized Barbie house in Berlin, the protestors outnumbered the fans! Demonstrators actually burned a doll on a cross at the opening of the Mattel toy's fictional Malibu Dreamhouse in the German capital before being ejected by security guards. The Berlin attraction is the second such theme house after a similar one opened recently in Florida. Visitors can fully immerse themselves in all things Barbie including checking out Barbie's walk-in wardrobes and even "try on" her outfits using a digital mirror. Detractors, including Michael Koschitzki, editor at Socialist Alternative, said the attraction presented the idea that there were only two career options for women: model or pop star. The Barbie Dreamhouse will remain in the German capital until August before going on tour around Europe.
Kill A Zoo Monkey -- That's Seven Years!
Killing a zoo monkey in Idaho is serious business. After 22-year-old Michael Watkins pleaded guilty to attempted grand theft, a felony, and misdemeanor animal cruelty stemming from the break-in and beating death of the monkey at Zoo Boise in November, he's been sentenced to spend the next seven years in prison! The primate was one of the zoo's two Patas monkeys, ground-dwelling animals from Africa that stand more than 2 feet tall and weigh about 35 pounds. They are rare in zoos but not endangered in the wild. The case shook officials at the zoo and triggered an outpouring of sympathy and donations from animal lovers worldwide. Watkins scaled the security fence at Zoo Boise in the pre-dawn hours of November 17 and attempted to steal the monkey, which bit him. Watkins then kicked and hit the animal, which ultimately killed it. In the meantime, Zoo gained two female Patas monkeys donated by the Rosamund Gifford Zoo in Syracuse, New York.
Going On a Gator Hunt!
When Houston-area high school senior 18-year-old Braxton Bielski went on his first ever gator hunt, he had no idea he'd be setting a new state record. The boy bagged an amazing 14-foot, 800 pound alligator - the heaviest ever certified in Texas! He shot the giant reptile after hooking it on a line using raw chicken as bait. Bielski's father, Troy Bielski, won a Parks and Wildlife drawing for a five-day permit to hunt in the Daughtry Wildlife Management Area. The Houston police officer says his son had been dreaming of hunting alligators for years. Parks and Wildlife says the alligator was between 30 and 50 years old.
Pssst! Hey, Wanna Baby?
Police in Phoenix have charged 36-year-old Rozenna Luna with child abuse after she allegedly tried to give her 6-month-old baby away to strangers outside a convenience store! Witnesses told officers that Luna was asking strangers if they wanted a free child. Police say Luna had been drinking and smoking meth and had made no attempt to contact any safe haven locations, government agencies or family members for help. Iroinically, Luna ended up calling police herself. They say she knew she would be taken to jail on outstanding misdemeanor warrants and would not have to take care of her daughter. The baby is in state custody.
Portable Potty Prank!
Police in Poland are investigating after a college student was hurt when a portable toilet was turned upside down ... while he was using it! Kondrat Jaworski, 23, had sat down in the toilet after several beers during an end of exams celebration in Krakow when the pranksters struck. Police are now studying mobile phone images of the incident that left the engineering student with a cut head and covered in you know what! Jaworski said, "It may have been a laugh for those involved but it was no joke, I landed on my head and then got covered in a foul smelling chemical liquid. Even the toilet seat fell on my head. I then had to try and pull my trousers up in the dark and find the door lock." Police say the young men involved will be prosecuted for vandalism and assault.
What?! You Don't Love the Smell of Frying Bacon?
A San Francisco bacon restaurant -- called Bacon Bacon-is having to close its doors after neighbors' complaints about the smell of bacon! The restaurant's owner, Jim Angelus, "failed" to negotiate with neighbors who took offense to the pork restaurant's smell. The smell led to the revelation that the restaurant failed to get "proper health permits" last summer. Neighbors claimed that the thick bacon aroma was overpowering and that grease was illegally disposed of in the sewers. Neighbors also say that they offered to buy the restaurant owner a new air filter -- but he declined. Angelus says he'll revive the restaurant's food truck -- when he can find an approved kitchen location in which to prepare meals.
Hey, It Worked the First Time!
In San Luis Obispo, Calif., 48-year-old Carl Bellenir was after a trip to Santa Barbara Bank & Trust where he had successfully cashed in several rolls of pennies that had been stuffed into rolls labeled for dimes. Not thinking that the rolls would be examined later in the day, Bellenir stupidly returned the very next morning to the same bank to try it again! This time police were called, and Bellenir fled, but he was captured down the street at a Bank of America trying the same trick!
Pot Fields Busted By Smokejumpers!
Do you know what smokejumpers are? They're the brave firefighters who parachute into remote areas to combat wildfires. Well a team of six smokejumpers parachuted into a fire in the mountains of Southern Oregon and ended up landing right in the middle of an illegal marijuana farm being prepared for growing season! Jackson County sheriff's spokeswoman Andrea Carlson says the smokejumpers notified authorities, who hiked into the remote site in the Rogue River-Siskiyou (SIS'-kee-yoo) National Forest. They seized two guns and more than 1,000 little pot plants. Carlson says the site near the community of Applegate was being cultivated by growers for Mexican drug gangs and has been used before. Meanwhile, the smokejumpers extinguished the wildfire after it burned less than an acre.
Sure We Got Free Speech, Except on Gravestones!
Sonny Santiago was a 23-year-old rapper from Massachusetts who died in a car crash in February. And while his raps may have been riddled with profanity, there will not be any profanity on his headstone. That's the final word from commissioners at Pine Grove Cemetery in Lynn, Massachusetts, who unanimously rejected his family's request to inscribe his gravestone with a song verse that included profanity. "We've never had a problem like this before," said commission Chairman Arthur Dulong. But rather than the big free speech lawsuit you would expect, the family has simply agreed to have the gravestone inscribed with a different, profanity-free verse from a song Santiago wrote. However, the commission's dispute with Santiago's family is not over. The family added a 3-foot by 8-foot decoration made from mulch and rocks on his gravesite shaped like the number "1." Uno was his performance name. The family has been asked to remove the decoration because it does not conform to cemetery rules. Santiago's mother, Ana DeJesus, said the family will comply with the request - but she's not happy about it.
Stop Smoking... The Really Hard Way!
Anyone who's ever tried to quit smoking knows it's not easy-- but there's got to be an easier way than this. In Sacramento, California, 31-year-old Etta Lopez slapped a policeman in the face-- because she wanted to be locked up to help her give up her smoking habit! Deputy Matt Campoy was leaving his shift at the Sacramento County Jail when Lopez purposefully blocked his way. Campoy said, "It was totally unprovoked. All of a sudden she stepped into me and slapped me in the face." Lopez was charged with assaulting a police officer after admitting she sat in front of the county jail for hours intent on assaulting an officer to get arrested and be put in jail, where she would be forced to stop smoking.
Aliens Abducted By Humans!
We've got a reverse alien abduction story for you. It seems two aliens have been abducted by humans! In Roanoke, Virginia, Robert and Dian Bolling have appealed for the safe return of the two aliens that they had placed in their front garden. The couple has combed their neighborhood and put up posters in an attempt to be reunited with their unusual garden gnomes. Police are investigating the crime after the 3-foot tall bright green molded plastic creatures disappeared. Mrs. Bolling said, "We just want them back - no questions asked. Together we will bring our aliens home." The Bollings bought the alien couple over a decade ago at a Halloween clearance sale and they have been the pride of their garden ever since.
Oh, So You Like The Vaccines?
British indie rockers The Vaccines were apparently intent on finding out who their real fans were. At a show in north Wales, fans were refused entry if they were unable to name the band's lead singer. In actuality, it was the idea of police officers and club bouncers who asked fans questions about the band after a tip-off that pickpockets were planning to target the show. Fans were asked to name the lead singer and titles of their albums, before being allowed into the venue to try and separate the real fans from potential trouble makers. Six people were unable to answer some of the questions had their $25 tickets confiscated and refused admission! One of those refused entry turned out to be Andy Bellis, the lead singer of local band The Uninvited, who was none too happy and accused the police and venue bosses of being bullies. By the way, The Vaccines lead singer is Justin Young.
British Police Acting Like Supreme Jerks!
Guess police in Kent, England don't have much to do -- or they're the biggest jerks on the planet. Officers in Ramsgate, Kent apparently felt the need to issue a warning to a 10-year-old girl that drawing a hopscotch grid on the pavement with chalk amounted to criminal damage! Little Lilly Allen was given the warning by two officers as she played the skipping game outside her home. Her father, Robert Allen, has since lodged a formal complaint to Kent Police over the incident. A Kent Police spokesman said in a statement: "We are trying to trace the officers, who are reported to have made this comment. From the circumstances described, it would not appear to have been necessary to advise the young girl that chalking a hopscotch grid may be criminal damage and illegal."
That'll Teach You To Run From the Law!
In Pinellas Park, Florida, 20-year-old Bryan Zuniga learned the hard way that it's not a good idea to run from the law! The Pinellas County Sheriff's Office says Zuniga was pulled over for failing to maintain a single lane at about 2:50 a.m. But right after Zuniga stopped the vehicle, he allegedly jumped out of the passenger door, then broke through a vinyl fence and fled. Police found him a few hours later -- at a local hospital. That's because the fence he broke through was for a water treatment plant -- where alligators are known to hang out. He told deputies he had been attacked by a gator and was being treated for multiple puncture wounds to the face, arm and armpit area. Zuniga was charged with fleeing police, driving with a suspended or revoked license and resisting an officer without violence.
World's Highest Chair Swing Opens
Want to ride the world's highest chair swing? You'll have to go to Sweden. The world's highest chair carousel has opened offering amazing panoramic views of Stockholm and Djurg�rden-- for those brave enough to open their eyes. The 400-foot Eclipse features 12 swings with double seats that hang from 8-foot long chains and revolves at a top speed of more than 40mph. Peter Osbeck, head of attractions at the Stockholm theme park where it is based, said: "We wanted to do something grand for our 130th anniversary and we did. Luckily, we have double seats, which means that you aren't alone up there."
The Matrix: Mom's Version
Joe Nicolosi of Austin, Texas has produced the latest viral video -- a short film of his 65-year-old mother trying to explain the plot of sci-fi classic The Matrix. Over 2.2 million people have watched the hilarious three-minute YouTube clip called: "The Matrix Retold by Mum." Joe explained, "My mom hadn't seen or heard of the Matrix so we watched the entire movie together and right after she told me what it was all about." Despite referring to Keanu Reeves' character as Leo and turning Morpheus into Moshimoshe, she did identify Neo as "the one who can beat out the Matrix."
Gerbil Pageant Held This Weekend
While you were busy wasting your weekend, America's biggest gerbil lovers were gathered in New England for the American Gerbil Society's annual pageant. The competition, held in Bedford, Massachusetts, called for agility demonstrations in which the gerbils must overcome obstacles and race to the end of a course. Breeders of the small animals vie for coveted ribbons based on body type and agility. "A male gerbil should be a good, strong, hefty-looking gerbil," said Libby Hanna, president of the American Gerbil Society. "If you are going to think of it in human terms, you might think of a football player - somebody who's big, thick neck, nice, strong-looking male gerbil." An ideal female gerbil will have a more streamlined appearance that even humans covet, she said. The Friday-Saturday show drew gerbil enthusiasts and breeders from around the country and culminated in the presentation of champion and breeder certificates.
School Closing -- For NICE Weather!
Bellingham Christian School in a sun-deprived part of Washington State closed the school down -- due to beautiful weather! Last Friday all 205 students of the private, nondenominational Christian school in Bellingham got the day off as the forecast called for a rare day of sunshine! Principal Bob Sampson said he wanted to give students some time to re-energize and enjoy the weather, adding that he wanted to re-create the excitement snow days get among the kids. Sampson surveyed parents to make sure the day off wouldn't cause any hardships and floated the idea with the school board before canceling school.
Twins Retire Together at Age 70... As Prostitutes!
Twin sisters Louise and Martine Fokkens, both age 70, announced their joint retirement after more than 50 years each on the job -- as Amsterdam prostitutes! No kidding! Last February the minimum age for legal prostitutes in the Netherlands was raised to 21, but there is no maximum. The twins estimated they had 355,000 client-visits between them, and Martine noted that she still has one devoted regular who she'll have to disappoint. Louise, though, appeared happier to hang up her mattress for good because of arthritis. The sisters complained about the legalization of brothels in 2000 and ensuing taxation-- which required the women to take on more clients to make the same money they had been used to.
There Goes Old Fire Face!
Let's hope this doesn't catch on here. The newest beauty-treatment rage in China, according to Chinese media quoted on the Inquisitr.com website, is the "fire facial," in which alcohol and a "secret elixir" are dabbed on the face and then SET ABLAZE for a few seconds-- then extinguished. According to "ancient Chinese medicine," this will burn off "dull" skin as well as alleviate the common cold and reduce obesity. If done properly, the client feels so pain. Operative words: If done properly!
Fear of Incest-- Yeah, There's An App For That! The small country of Iceland has kind of a unique problem. Most of the 320,000 inhabitants are at least distantly related to each other and there's even a "Book of Icelanders" database which the government keeps updated, showing family connections dating back 1,200 years. With only 320,000 people in the entire country, "accidental" incest is unfortunately a genuine problem so three software engineers recently created a mobile phone app that allows strangers to "bump" phones with each other and find out instantly if they are closely related. In its first few days of release, the developers said it had already been used almost 4,000 times.
Grandma Swallowed What? The basic premise of the Tampa Women's Club charity event was pretty straight forward. For $20, you could buy a flute of champagne and a chance to win a one-carat, $5,000 diamond. There were 400 champagne glasses in all and organizers placed cubic zirconias worth about $10 bucks in all but one of them. The last glass contained the prized diamond, donated by Continental Wholesale Diamonds. So what could possibly go wrong? You guessed it -- the diamond was swallowed by 80-year-old Miriam Tucker! Apparently she didn't want to put her finger in the champagne, so she drank a bit. But then, while laughing with some of the women at her table, she realized she swallowed it. Embarrassed, she finally had to tell jewelers who were frantically searching for the winner. Since she was already scheduled for a colonoscopy on Monday, she just had a doctor recover the jewel.
Anyone Lose a Head?
Hey anybody lose a head over the weekend? That's what officials at Marist College in Poughkeepsie, New York would like to know. At least it's not a real head. It's a rather large one though -- 7-feet tall to be exact-- and made of Styrofoam and fiberglass. The men's rowing crew team found it floating in the Hudson River while practicing. They hooked a rope to it and towed it to shore. The head has the appearance of a Greek or Roman-style statue. College officials believe it might be a theater prop, but so far no one has come forward to claim the giant head.
The Suspect Is Well-Groomed... Obviously!
Police in Golden, Colorado are looking for a very well-groomed man suspected of stealing more than $2,600 worth of teeth-whitening strips, weight-loss pills, condoms, Rogaine and other hair-growth products from several Walgreens stores. Investigators say the handsome man, wearing a sweater, tie, slacks and a neatly groomed mustache and beard, apparently used a coat that he was carrying to conceal the stolen goods. They say he would purchase a DVD before leaving the stores, apparently as a cover for keeping the door alarm from activating.
What Are the Odds of an ABBA Reunion?
What do you think the odds are of an actual ABBA reunion? Well a British bookie is taking bets after singer Agnetha Faltskog hinted that it could be possible. Faltskog, who has come out of retirement to release a solo album called "A", was asked by reporters if she would be open to an ABBA reunion and she responded positively. "Maybe a charity concert? I would not say 'No' right away," she said. Her former husband Bjorn Ulvaeus and his fellow ABBA songwriter Benny Andersson vowed in 2008 not to reform the group that broke up in 1982 after nine British No.1 hits. The fourth member was Anni-Frid Lyngstad who of course was married to Andersson in the only band more incestual and dysfunctional than Fleetwood Mac! Of course betting on pretty much everything is legal in Britain and bookmakers Paddy Power seized on the speculation to offer odds of 14/1 for ABBA to perform together in 2013.
Too Good Looking For Saudi Arabia?
As crazy as it sounds, Omar Borkan Al Gala, an actor and photographer from Dubai, was actually kicked out of Saudi Arabia for being too handsome! No kidding. Al Gala was given his marching orders along with a number of other men at a cultural festival earlier this month. A video of him in a variety of model-style poses is currently going viral on YouTube with more than 150,000 hits so far. Officials reportedly feared the United Arab Emirates delegates might corrupt impressionable women at the annual Janadriyah Festival. "A festival official said the three Emiratis were taken out on the grounds they are too handsome and that the Commission members feared female visitors could fall for them.
You Can't Fire Me Just Because My Bladder Is Shy!
In Des Moines, Iowa, Jennifer Conner said she lost her job over her shy bladder! Conner was offered a job at Iowa Methodist Medical Center in June, 2012-- contingent on successfully completing a drug test. But that doesn't come easy for her as he has been diagnosed with paruresis, more commonly called "shy bladder syndrome." That basically means it's hard for you to go in a public restroom. Nurses at the facility where Conner tried to take her test did not provide her with any alternative accommodations, even though she offered to take a blood test or use a catheter to extract urine at her own expense. But those offers were refused. So Conner's suing. The International Paruresis Association reports that roughly 21 million people worldwide have the condition, also referred to as "pee-shy" or "bashful bladder."
We Only Want Him. The Rest of You Boogie On Down!
There may be no more embarrassing place to be arrested than while you're boogying down on the dance floor! But it happened in Albuquerque, New Mexico where federal officials say suspected drug trafficker Omar Cota was taken into custody this weekend off a dance floor at Route 66 Casino's Club Envy. Cota is believed to be affiliated with the deadly Sinaloa Cartel. The U.S. Marshals Service says Cota had an outstanding federal arrest warrant for drug trafficking and had eluded federal agents since February 2012. Agents found a large amount of cash and suspected drugs with Cota, who is believed to be a member of the Brew Town gang.
Bar Raised For Manliness! Three Guys Catch Shark With Bare Hands!
The bar for manliness just got seriously raised! Using nothing but their bare hands, Cody Harlan, Jonathan Cook and Robert Trutt hauled in a 277-pound BULL SHARK from the ocean! Cook later said, "It was stupid, but a good memory." The three friends had gone to Fort Walton Beach to fish for pompano. But when they got there, they saw would appeared to be a piece of driftwood in the water. When they realized it was a shark and was lying belly up, they assumed it was dead. Harlan waded out about chest-deep and grabbed the shark's tail. It never really made a move, and Harlan started pulling it back to shore. When he got the shark back about knee-deep in the water, Trutt and Cook helped drag it up on the beach. But once they got the shark on dry land it started moving. Trutt said, "It started opening its mouth like it was gulping for air and moving its tail." Not knowing if it was legal to take the shark, they called the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission. After being told anything over 54 inches was fair game, Cook said, "I got my Nike bat out of the truck and knocked her out." They eventually found a 40 pound fish stuck in the shark's throat and figured it choked. Once the shark was dead, it took them about 90 minutes to pull it from the beach to their truck. They then took it to HarborWalk Marina to weigh it, and quite a crowd gathered as it hung from the scale. Harlan later said, "I feel like an idiot now. He wasn't dead. The only thing that saved us was it had a fish in its mouth."
Sometimes It's Best NOT To Hit the Target!
In Ocala, Florida, 79-year-old Norma Joan Brennan was on her way to get driver's license restored. Sadly it doesn't look like that will be happening because a funny thing happened on the way to the DMV -- she CRASHED THROUGHT THE FRONT DOORS OF A TARGET STORE! Ms. Brennan's passenger and the owner of the vehicle, Rev. Kevin Holsapple, told police that he was giving her some driving tips in the parking lot when she pressed down on the gas pedal instead of the brake. While she's had a driver's license for about 50 years, it had been suspended due to a medical condition. No one was injured in the incident, but Brennan got a citation for driving with a suspend license, and the pastor was cited for allowing an unlicensed driver to drive his vehicle.
Solving India's Rape Problem
The unfortunate culture of sexual abuse in India has been well publicized over the last year due to multiple headline-grabbing stories of rape incidents. To counter the problem, three engineers in Chennai will soon be marketing a new line of women's anti-rape undergarment -- which will provide both a stun-gun-sized blast of electricity against any unwanted aggressor and also a messaging system which would immediately send a GPS location to family members and police about an attack in progress. According to one of the inventors, after the wearer engages a switch, anyone touching the fitted garment will, "get the shock of his life." She will be protected as the garment's skin side would be heavily insulated. The only holdup at this point is finding a fabric that can hold the electronics and is still washable.
10,000 iPhones Fall Like Dominoes!
One of the latest viral YouTube videos shows what appears to be 10,000 iPhone 5s standing on end and falling over like dominoes. Over 3.5 million views so far-- but we should tell you -- it's not real. The images are computer generated and created by an ad agency. At one stage, the run of falling iPhones, which together would be worth well over $4 million in real life, enters an elevator and comes out at a different floor. Aatma Studio produced the one minute concept promo for Near Field Communications to demonstrate how information can be passed across screens.
Two-Year-Old Falls 30 Feet! Not Even a Scratch!
In Munich, Germany, 2-year-old Maria Kohler is one lucky little girl. She had a miraculous fall from a fourth floor balcony when she bounced off a canvas awning and landed softly and safely on grass completely unharmed! Maria was standing on the balcony watching passing trains when she slipped and fell. A doctor at the local hospital where she was taken after the accident said, "She must have a very special guardian angel because she didn't even have a bruise or a scratch." Her mother, 32-year-old Melanie Kohler said, "I once accidentally dropped an apple off the balcony and it smashed to pieces. Yet my daughter survived unhurt. It really is a miracle." For her part, little Maria told her mom, "I'm sorry mummy - I won't do it again."
Needed: Manager -- For Stonehenge!
Are you one of those many people who struggle through life, never quite able to find the right job in your chosen field of ancient mysticism? Well, today is your lucky day my friend. English Heritage is advertising for a new general manager to look after Stonehenge! Yes -- the Stonehenge! The company is looking for "a dynamic and inspirational leader" to look after the prehistoric site in Wiltshire. You'll be responsible for managing the monument's 180 staff members and volunteers and you'll also need to do some regular liaising with druid leaders. Other responsibilities include overseeing arrangements for summer and winter solstices and making sure those "solstice celebrations aren't in some way compromising the mystery and integrity of the stones". And it pays well-- $100,000 a year, plus benefits!
More Creative Lawsuits!
Not quite sure what this might do to his street cred, but aspiring New York rapper Bernard Bey has filed a $200,000 lawsuit against his own parents. Mr. Bey, who is currently homeless, claims that his mom and dad owe him big because they have been unloving and "indifferent" to his homelessness and refuse even to let him back in their home to get a shower. Bey, who raps under the moniker "Brooklyn Streets," said that he'd be willing to let bygones be bygones and all would be forgiven if they would just buy him two Domino's Pizza franchises so that he could eventually earn enough to become "a force to be reckoned with in the hip-hop industry." For her part, his mother offered her own solution which was that Bey should "go get a job" -- something she says he's never had a day in his life!
Be Funny, But Be Brief!
Can you be funny in 140 characters or less? Comedy Central is partnering with Twitter for a comedy festival where all jokes will have to either have to follow Twitters 140 characters rule of be in the form of a 6-second video! The festival with the hashtag "ComedyFest" will debut April 29. Over five days, comedians will tweet jokes and post videos with the recently launched video app Vine, which limits footage to 6 seconds. Kicking off the social media festival will be an event at the Paley Center in Los Angeles featuring Rob Reiner, Judd Apatow and Mel Brooks. So far, Brooks is a Twitter holdout.
Light Drinking OK During Pregnancy!
According to a new report in the International Journal of Obstetrics , light drinking during pregnancy does not harm child behavioral or mental development! They studied the development of 10,534 UK seven-year-olds, whose mothers had either abstained from alcohol or drank lightly while pregnant. There was virtually no difference noted in the two groups. Prof Yvonne Kelly, co-author of the study, said: "We know heavy drinking during pregnancy has a very deleterious effect, but it is very unlikely that drinking small amounts will have an impact." She added, "It doesn't seem biologically plausible that small amounts of alcohol would affect development either way. The environment children grow up in is massively more important." And for the record, light drinking was defined as consuming no more than two drinks per week. However, both the U.K. and the U.S. respective Departments of Health both agree that complete abstinence from alcohol during pregnancy is still the safest option.
Shark Vs. Kayak
Isaac Brumaghim was fishing in his small kayak off the coast of Oahu, Hawaii and had a pretty nice tuna on the line. All of the sudden a 10-foot tiger shark leapt from the water and caught hold of the tuna, nearly pulling Issac overboard. He eventually managed to wrestle back control of his rod from the shark and has now uploaded a YouTube clip of the clash, called "Chompy The Shark," which has so far been watched nearly 1.4million times. Issac said, "Yeah, I did get the shivers a bit on it just thinking about the whole thing and the possibility of me actually putting my hands in after my fish. It made me think how foolish that would have been."
New Perfume... For Zombies!
Let's face it -- it's just hard to smell good if you're a zombie. Well, a US perfume company may have solved the problem by launching two new fragrances which it says will help the undead smell more bearable to the living. The New York-based Demeter Fragrance Library claims Zombie for Him and Zombie for Her will enable the "dead to simply pass by without offending". Zombie for Him is said to be a combination of dried leaves, mushrooms, mildew, moss and earth, while Zombie for Her is a slightly lighter version with a touch of dregs from the bottom of the wine barrel for a feminine touch. The company describes the perfumes as "eminently wearable" although we suggest caution -- especially at the office or on a first date!
Parking Fine: Extreme Edition!
A woman in Chicago is trying to get out of paying a parking fine that has snowballed to more than $100,000. Jennifer Fitzgerald filed a lawsuit last year against the city over the $105,000 worth of tickets that police gave her over a three year period. That's because her car was left for that long at an O'Hare International Airport employee parking lot. But Miss Fitzgerald says she should not be held responsible because her ex-boyfriend is the one who abandoned the car. He is also named in the suit. However a judge dismissed the lawsuit last week and pressed the parties to try to reach a settlement. Fitzgerald says she has no intention of paying over a hundred grand on a car that's hardly worth $600 to begin with.
Bras: What's the Point?
A little-known French sports doctor who spent 16 years studying the busts of about 300 women says as far as he's concerned -- bras are useless! 62-year-old Jean-Denis Rouillon told a college radio station that his work suggested wearing a bra weakened the natural muscles that hold up breasts and women should consider going bra-less. One 28-year-old volunteer in the study said abandoning her bra had liberated her in more ways than one, improving her breathing and posture. She explained, "You breathe better, you stand up straighter, you have less back pain." Rouillon also said that bras unnaturally hamper circulation. However, he did also say, "But a middle-aged women, overweight, with 2.4 children? I'm not at all sure she'd benefit from abandoning bras."
Is the Dirt Good Tonight?
While some third-world country citizens will literally eat dirt for lack of anything else, diners at Tokyo's upscale Ne Quittez Pas restaurant eat it because it is a trendy dish prepared by prominent chef Toshio Tanabe. Among his courses are soil soup served with a flake of dirty truffle, soil sorbet and the "soil surprise"-- a dirt-covered potato ball. Spoiler alert: It has a truffle center! Tanabe lightly precooks his dirt and runs it through a sieve to eliminate the crunchiness. Bon Appetite!
Go Ahead -- Fart All You Want
A French doctor is urging his countrymen to take a more relaxed view of bodily functions for the sake of their health. In his book, Le Grand Menage, Dr. Federic Saldmann says people should give free rein to farting, burping and sweating to reduce the risk of cancer. He explains that getting rid of the two liters of gas produced each day is a "natural process" and retaining it can be harmful to the intestines. Keeping air in the stomach leads to more heartburn, which increases the risk of cancer of the esophagus. The rise of this disease in France, he says, is due to "the burp that we no longer do". Dr. Saldmann also recommends throwing out anti-perspirants saying, "To block sweat not only stops the elimination of toxins, but also a certain number of messages that are potentially very attractive to the opposite sex."
Wake Me in 19 Years
65-year-old Polish railway worker Jan Grzebski fell into a coma after being hit by a train back in 1988. 19 years later, he has finally woken up. It was rather startling to find the Communist party no longer in power and food no longer rationed. Jan said, "Now there are so many goods in the shops it makes my head spin. When I went into a coma there was only tea and vinegar in the shops, meat was rationed and huge lines for gas were everywhere. And here's some perspective for you. Jan added, "What amazes me today is all these people who walk around with their mobile phones and never stop moaning. I've got nothing to complain about." Jan credits his wife Gertruda with saving his life. While doctors gave him only two or three years to live, Gertruda stayed by his side and reportedly moved her husband every hour to prevent bed sores.
Wanna Get Drunk? Just Add Water!
The new rage with the kids in the Netherlands is a concoction called Booz2Go. It's a powdered version of alcohol that was created by some Dutch students, and when mixed with water becomes a bubbly, lime-colored and flavored drink with 3 percent alcohol content -- about the same as beer. The big problem is, as the current law stands, it can be legally sold to minors! Student Van Elderen and four classmates at Helicon Vocational Institute came up with the idea as part of their senior-year project. They said, "Because the alcohol is not in liquid form, we can sell it to people under 16." And yes -- what you're thinking is right -- the legal age for drinking alcohol and smoking in the Netherlands is 16! Which is probably why you never meet any really old Dutch people.
Let's Hang Up a Dead Horse! Who Would Mind?
An art gallery in Geneva, Switzerland has infuriated animal lovers-- by hanging a dead horse from the ceiling! No kidding. A real horses' preserved body has been suspended from two slings around its neck and hind quarters in the window of the modern art showroom. But it's facing an angry backlash from locals, who pay for the city-council owned gallery. One witness said, "It's horrendous, disgusting. Why did they put it there? It's shocking." "If that's what my taxes are being spent on I'll stop paying them. It's grotesque and cruel," said another. But the artists responsible for the sculpture - called 'Warhorse' - have refused to apologize. Maya Bosch and partner Regis Golay said: "We're glad people are reacting to our work. It wakes them up. We'd started to think that nothing could be shocking anymore."
Spain Raises Minimum Age -- For Sex!
Spain has raised the minimum age for marriage to 16 from what had been one of the lowest in the world at 14 as part of a wider reform to improve health and safety for children and adolescents. The reform, announced by Spanish Health Minister Ana Mato, also raises the age for consensual sex from what was the lowest in Europe at 13! The new age for consensual sex will later be decided by Parliament.
No Jail For Guy Who Watched Child Porn in First Class!
Even though 50-year-old Salt Lake City resident Grant Smith pleaded guilty to possessing child pornography -- and watching it IN FIRST CLASS on a Boston-bound commercial air flight-- he won't have to serve any jail time if he sticks to the terms of his probation. A Boston judge suspended Smith's 2 1/2-year sentence and placed him on five years' probation. Smith must continue sex offender treatment, comply with Utah sex offender registry requirements and follow restrictions on contact with children and Internet use. It seems a fellow first-class passenger saw Smith viewing pornographic computer images of young girls during a November 2011 flight. The passenger took a cellphone photo of the images and alerted a flight attendant. Smith was arrested in Boston and initially pleaded not guilty. He also resigned his job as a University of Utah engineering professor.
God Is in the Goldfish!
When Patti Burke, from Melbourne, Fla., first spotted a crown and cross imprinted on a Goldfish cracker she thought Pepperidge Farm might have been running a special promotion for Easter. But they called back and said nope. That's when Patti decided something miraculous had happened. She found particular significance in her discovery because she made it during Holy Week, the week before Easter. Also, the fish symbol holds prominence in the Christian religion as Christ referred to his disciples as "fishers of men."
Homeless Man Wins Lottery -- Decides To Stay Homeless!
We've heard of lottery winners keeping their jobs, but this is ridiculous. After winning $50,000 on an Indiana lottery scratch card, Dennis Mahurin says he'll remain homeless. Mr Mahurin, who lives in a tent and has been homeless for nearly 35 years, purchased the winning ticket in a gas station. But he says he likes his tent although admits he is tempted to upgrade it. But what's really amazing is that he says he's going to give $100 to each of the other homeless people in his community. He also plans to visit his son, have some dental work done and save some of the money but added, "I'm living in a tent, happy as can be in my nature."
Whooped By a Blind Man
In Indianapolis, even though 49-year-old Allan Kieta is legally blind, he had little trouble beating up an intruder in his home and holding him at knifepoint until police arrived. Allan told police his small dog began barking and he encountered the man saying, "I opened the door and just ran into him. I had him pinned in the laundry room and just kept pummeling." He then grabbed the intruder by the belt and dragged him into the kitchen, where he put a knife to the man's throat and tried to dial 911. Allan said, "Being visually impaired, I couldn't get the buttons because I was using my left hand. It took me about 20 tries." Police arrived within minutes and arrested 25-year-old Alvaro Castro. Lt. Jeff Duhamell said he was impressed with Allan's feat. Allan said he suffered swollen hands and a sore back, but no serious injuries. He noted, "When my wife was cleaning the blood off, she said, 'I think it's all his.'"
A religious beekeeper in Serbia has started making beehives shaped like tiny monasteries and churches "because bees have a soul too". 58-year-old Slobodan Jeftic says, "By doing this, I am bringing together the two great loves of my life, beekeeping and my religion. It means that as well as taking care of my bees so that they have a place to live and make their honey, I am also taking care of their souls." All of his beehives are now in the shape of various Orthodox churches and monasteries in Serbia.
Don't Take Your Boyfriend To Your Job Interview
In Springfield, Missouri, one woman learned the hard way that it's not always a good idea to take your boyfriend to a job interview. While she was applying for a job at Kohl's department store, he was supposed to be watching her 8-month old baby. Instead he decided to steal some T-shirts. He actually dropped the child when confronted by store employees. Police arrested the 22-year-old man who is not the father of the baby. The baby was safely returned to his mother. No word on whether she got the job but something tells us she's breaking up with the boyfriend. At least we hope so!
A Funny Thing Happened On My Way To See Obama
Down in Palm Bay, Florida, 35-year-old Cheryl Beauchamp was arrested after she allegedly pooped in a man's backyard and then went skinny dipping in his swimming pool. The official charge is burglary since just being disgusting and gross is apparently not against the law. The victimized homeowner said he called 911 after he spotted Beauchamp on a home surveillance system. He told officers he witnessed Beauchamp defecate in the yard before using a rock to cut the screen door that led to the pool. For her part, Beauchamp allegedly told police she was "just taking a bath" because she was homeless and that she was on her way to Washington D.C. to yell at Barack Obama.
Gee, When I Was In School We Pledged Allegiance To the Flag!
You know when I was a kid, they taught us to pledge allegiance to the flag in school. But at Chapin High School in Chapin, South Carolina, teacher Scott Compton has resigned after causing a major stink by stomping on an American flag in his classroom while talking glowingly about the U.S. and the importance of embracing freedom! Compton's attorney and the Lexington-Richland 5 School District released a joint statement announcing Compton's decision to resign at the end of this school year. The district's superintendent recommended that Compton be fired after parents complained about the bizarre lesson. But the teacher had been debating over whether to appeal to the school board. Compton's lawyer says he stomped the flag to show the idea of what America stands for is greater than the material objects like the flag that represent it and that the teacher did not intend to show any disrespect to military members to the country.
Mark of the Beast Continues To Terrorize the Faithful
For bible believers, the infamous "mark of the beast" number 666 continues to be troubling. In Clarksville, Tennessee, 52-year-old Walter Slonopas felt required to resign as a maintenance worker for Contech Casting after receiving his W-2 form this year and noticing to his horror that his W-2 was the 666th mailed out by Contech this year. It is confusing to note that Mr. Slonopas had had already been "assigned" the number 666 twice -- on the company's payroll books and the company's time-clock system in the less-than-two-years that he worked there. So no one is quite sure why the W-2 666 put him over the top.
Calling the Cops: Bad For Business??
Seems like society continues to punish those who do good and look out for the rest of us. In Shelby, Ohio, bartender Twyla DeVito said she knew that one of her regulars at the American Legion Post was far too inebriated to drive home and thus telephoned police, alerting them to a potential drunk driver. So an officer was dispatched, observed the driver, and arrested him when his blood-alcohol read twice the legal limit! Three cheers for Ms. DeVito who very well might have saved lives of those the driver could have killed right? Nope! Two days later DeVito was fired because, as her boss allegedly said to her, "It's bad for business to have a bartender that will call the cops."
Could You Please Be A Little Quieter Mr. Ocean?
A humorous list of actual complaints made by cruise line passengers has been released by cruise travel agency BonVoyage.co.uk, demonstrating just how insane some vacationers can be. Perhaps at the top of the list is the woman who complained to ship staff that the sea was being "too loud." Another couple accused a captain of being "rude" for sailing off when they had left a note saying they needed more sightseeing time in port. One woman, having seen a TV celebrity had been on her ship during an earlier trip demanded an explanation as to why he was not on her voyage. Then there was the man who complained about not getting "an impressive tan" and being unable to swim in the pool each day while on a trip around ... Alaska! And the woman travelling onboard Celebrity Cruises who asked for a refund because there were "no celebrities on board." But my personal favorite -- the couple who wanted compensation after forking out "a lot more money than planned" on staff tips due to their excellent service! Bonvoyage.co.uk cruise development manager Steph Curtin said, "From time to time we come across a few quirky complaints that we can do little to help. I'm afraid we can't be held responsible for the sea being too loud or the lack of celebrities on board."
If you buy a bagel in New York, prepare to pay a bit more to have it sliced. In an extreme case of "creative taxation," New York actually imposes an 8 cent tax to all "altered" bagels, whether it is sliced, toasted or served with a "schmear" of cream cheese or butter. Carla Yrjanson, vice president of tax research and content for Thomson Reuters explains that in New York, "Cut bagels cross the line and become a prepared meal or food sold for on-premises consumption, which is taxable. On the other hand, "Uncut bagels are typically sold for home consumption and would meet the definition of a (tax) exempt food in New York." Such taxes allow states to bring in extra revenue without raising taxes across the board, said Barbara Weltman, author of J.K. Lasser's Small Business Taxes 2013.
Happy Easter Dad!
It wasn't exactly a happy Easter in Ashtabula, Ohio where police are investigating a shooting outside a church that left one man dead right after Easter Sunday services ended! According to reports, the shooting occurred at the Hiawatha Church of God in Christ. The victim was 52-year-old Richard Riddle and the shooter was allegedly Riddle's own son -- who was taken into custody. Ashtabula Police Chief Robert Stell believes the suspect was outside the church, waiting for the victim to emerge. One of the church's pastors told the station the gunman went inside and sat down after the shooting. Stell said the suspect still had his weapon in his hands when officers arrived and that the victim's mother witnessed the shootin.
Okay North Korea Is Really Pissing Me Off!
It's usually easy to just laugh off the nutty North Korean government but now they've released a propaganda video showing them "defeating" U.S. troops! The four-minute video titled "A Short, Three-Day War," begins with images of a massive artillery and rocket barrage, followed by a large-scale land and air assault with North Korean troops streaming over the border into South Korea. The film depicts paratroopers descending on Seoul in an invasion scenario that it said would see thousands of U.S. citizens living in South Korea taken hostage. The thing was posted on the North's official website, Uriminzokkiri, which distributes news and propaganda from the state media. The video's narrator describes different stages of the invasion, including the destruction of forces under the U.Ss Pacific Command with "powerful weapons of mass destruction." He goes on to say, "The crack stormtroops will occupy Seoul and other cities and take 150,000 US citizens as hostages." A video released early last month showed New York in flames after an apparent missile attack, and another two weeks later depicted US soldiers and President Barack Obama burning in the flames of a nuclear blast.
7-Year-Old Asked To Pepper Spray Store Employees!
Philadelphia police say 27-year-old Delaina Garling a returned to a Family Dollar store where she'd been banned and pepper-sprayed employees! While other employees tried to escort her out, Garling gave the can to her 7-year-old daughter and asked her to continue the fight! Garling had been banned from the store for alleged theft. Police Superintendent Michael Chitwood says after employees tackled her, she handed the can to her daughter and said. "You know what to do, baby. Spray it!" Apparently the little girl had more sense than her mother and did not use the spray. Garling is now charged with simple assault and other counts.
Guess Who Really Wants Saturday Mail?
While there are probably many who aren't happy about the proposed cancellation of Saturday mail delivery by the U.S. Postal Service, guess who's really seething -- Hallmark Cards of course. The greeting card giant has registered its own in-house lobbyist as Congress battles over the future of Saturday mail delivery. Hallmark also has some outside lobby firms, like Capitol Tax Partners. In addition, Rafe Morrissey, a long-time lobbyist for greeting card companies, started his own firm on March 1 -- Morrissey Strategic Partners -- and is lobbying for Hallmark and the Greeting Card Association. Morrissey said, "We think it's very serious for the postal service and if it's very serious for the postal service, it's very serious for us. More than 60 percent of our cards are delivered through the postal service." The U.S. Post Office announced earlier this year that it would move to five-day delivery of letters by August and deliver only packages on Saturday duo to a $16 Billion shortfall in its budget. Republican leaders have given the USPS a green light to end six-day mail, arguing the spending bill's language is vague. They say the postal service is not eliminating a day of service under the plan, but simply changing what is delivered on certain days.
The Mayans Were Wrong -- And So Was Punxsutawney Phil!
If you remember back to early February, America's favorite groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil, did not see his shadow and predicted early warm weather and winter ending early. Well, that really hasn't happened in most parts of the county and authorities in still-frigid Ohio have issued an "indictment" against the famed groundhog. Spring officially arrived last Wednesday, but with temperatures still hovering in the 30s in the Buckeye state and much of the Northeast, it hardly seems like it. So the heat is on against Phil, and the furry rodent has been charged with misrepresentation of spring, a felony "against the peace and dignity of the state of Ohio," wrote prosecutor Mike Gmoser in an official-looking indictment."Punxsutawney Phil did purposely, and with prior calculation and design, cause the people to believe that spring would come early," Gmoser declared. Meanwhile, the chubby-cheeked animal also has his defenders. "Phree Phil!" declared one supporter on his Facebook page. "We're with you, Phil," wrote another.
Booing Okay -- If You're Polite About It!
In Riverhead, New York, the town's board members have made a bold decision -- they've decided it's OK to boo at their meetings-as long as it's done politely. Yes, the Riverhead board voted 4-1 to strike the anti-boo rule from the books. However disruptive behavior and disruptive demonstrations will still not be tolerated. No real explanation was given on how to boo without being disruptive or how to boo "politely." Councilman James Wooten thought the whole thing was kind of stupid and says the town supervisor should be able to keep order at a meeting without written rules. But Supervisor Sean Walter defends the anti-booing rule noting there are similar regulations in towns across New York state.
Cheaters At Harvard? Seriously?
Famed Harvard University will be stripped of four national quiz championship titles after organizers found that Harvard competitor Andy Watkins accessed pages on its administrative Website just before the 2009, 2010 and 2011 Intercollegiate Championship Tournaments or "Quiz Bowls". In other words, Harvard cheated. Robert Hentzel, NAQT president said, "We can't have that happen!" The quiz organizers said their review found that Watkins accessed Web pages that showed the first 40 characters of questions to be asked at the tournaments, though it said it had no direct or statistical evidence that Watkins and three others took advantage of their prior access in game situations. Watkins claimed he didn't do anything wrong and said, "My immaturity damaged my much-prized relationship with NAQT and cast undue doubt on three remarkable accomplishments by three Harvard teams. I regret my breaches of question security and though I know everyone will make their own judgments, I did compete in good faith." It was just last year when dozens of Harvard students were forced to withdraw temporarily from the university after cheating on a final exam in the largest academic scandal to hit the nearly four-century-old school in recent memory.
Guess What'll Make You Hit the High Notes?
Are you a singer? Want to hit the really high notes? In Canada, University of Alberta drama professor David Ley has found quite an unorthodox method to help his singers. He's using sex toys to massage the outside of their throats! Ley says, "I know it's a bit different. I know there's a giggle factor, but it works. It relaxes tension in the larynx, it improves range and projection." He was looking for an alternative to massaging the larynx by hand, for people who hate the feel of fingers on their throat, when he discovered the technique. That led him to a sex shop where he found some vibrators that had a frequency around 100 and 120 hertz, the range of the human voice. He tried some on a student with good results.
World's Smallest St. Patrick's Day Parade!
Hope you had a fun St. Patrick's Day weekend. They sure did in Enterprise, Alabama -- home of the world's smallest St. Patrick's Day parade. If you ever get a chance to see it you'll quickly understand why. It has only one marcher -- the only person in the town with actual Irish ancestry, who marches for about ten minutes carrying the colors of the Emerald Isle down 1 block of East College Street, from the Court House, the town's other unique institution, the Boll Weevil Monument, and back. After the event, the Grand Marshall attended a traditional reception hosted by Murdock Realty located along the parade route. The parade began in 1993 as a way to recognize a seldom-celebrated holiday in Enterprise. Chamber of Commerce president Phil Thomas said, "We realized that we could never have the largest St. Patrick's Day parade, so decided to have the smallest."
Turns Out We're Pretty Boring!
Folks may not be too happy with the Bristol City Council in England. The council spent over $100,000 so that they could broadcast their meetings live online. Only problem is they have admitted that so far, only three people have logged in to watch -- IN THE LAST FIVE YEARS! The council thought the live broadcasts would make their meetings more transparent and hold members responsible. There are now calls for a review into the "webcasts" to broadcast local decision making to a wider audience. However, the council still says the project was a "huge success" saying that while the live audience was small, "hundreds" more people later watched meetings on the website's archive.
Ma'am Do You Know How Fast You Were... Holy Cow!
In Iowa City, Iowa, police officer Kevin Wolfe pulled over a speeding SUV and then realized the couple inside had a very good reason for speeding. The driver jumped out and yelled, "Sir, we're delivering a baby right here, right now!" Wolfe said that by the time he reached the passenger door of the SUV, the baby's head and arms were already out. So he jumped right in there and assisted in the final stages of the delivery and wrapped the child in a blanket before escorting the family to a hospital. Oh -- and he decided not to give the couple a ticket!
"The Old "Ninjas Did It" Excuse Fails Yet Again!
In Chicago, a 17-year-old teenager was injured in what police believe was a self-inflicted shooting. The boy was at Loyola Hospital in Maywood with a wound to his left groin area when police were called. Rather than admit to the self-shooting, the boy initially told offices that Nijas did it. No kidding! He said two men dressed in black and wearing Ninja masks jumped out of a black van. One of the men had a semi-automatic handgun and shot the boy. But police couldn't find any evidence of a shooting at the alleged shooting scene. After police returned to the hospital, they confronted the teen with their lack of findings. The boy continued to give conflicting information but eventually admitted he and two friends were playing with the gun when it went off accidentally.
Another 106-Year-Old High School Grad!
In Mt. Vernon, Ohio, 106-year-old Reba Williams did what few 106-year-olds ever do -- graduate from high school! Mount Vernon superintendent presented Reba with the diploma at her apartment in Columbus. She even got to wear a traditional graduation cap brought by the retired Mount Vernon English teacher who urged the school board to award the diploma. Williams has said she completed high school in Mount Vernon but was denied her diploma because she refused to read a final book assigned by a teacher. She'd read the book once and didn't want to read it again. Williams says she hopes current students realize that learning is important and that they probably shouldn't follow her example.
The country of Singapore is now offering college students seduction lessons -- in hopes they will boost the country's declining birth rate. The so-called love courses include watching romantic films, holding hands and something called "love song analysis". And along with "love and sexuality", the curriculum also deals with the importance of family life. One student said, "It's very interesting, and if I have a boyfriend in future, I'll know how to cope with any problems we may have." The government is also urging young people not to put their careers before establishing a family "because if you wait until then, sometimes it'll be a little too late".
Bizarre Circus Slaves Police in Italy rescued two teenage sisters from a circus which forced one of them to swim with flesh-eating piranhas for the amusement of guests! While the 19-year-old sister swam in a transparent tank with piranhas, the younger, 16-year-old was forced into another container where the circus staff tossed snakes at her. She was injured by one of the snakes. The three Italians who ran the circus were arrested and accused of forcing the sisters to live in virtual slavery. The suspects say it's not slavery and that the women were paid $150 bucks a week.
Really? There's a World Record For That?
A new world record has been set in Grand Rapids, Michigan! Organizers of the annual Gilda's Laugh Fest say they broken the world record for the most people wearing fake mustaches. The record is awaiting Guinness World Record certification but reportedly 1,544 people donned various shapes and sizes of dark 'staches on Thursday, the festival's opening day. If it sticks, the record would be the third set at the festival in as many years. Last year the festival broke the record for the most people wearing fake animal noses. The year before, it was people tossing rubber chickens. They have a lot of fun in Grand Rapids.
I Really Want To Work For Advance Medical!
Hey bosses -- listen up! Employees at a Florida health care company are allowed to drink on the company's tab, on company time, thanks to a perk known as "Beer Cart Fridays." Advance Medical CEO Jennifer Fuicelli says she's been rolling out the beer cart for two years as part of an "unorthodox corporate culture" that rewards employees for hard work. She must know what she's doing because the company started in 2005 with four employees. Now she has 350 workers in two locations-- Port Orange, Fla., and Broomfield, Colo. The company also hosts costume days for Halloween, barbecues on the clock and a birthday "get out of jail free" card, which can be used for a paid day off. Now by way of full disclosure, employees are restricted to one beer during Beer Cart Fridays, but Fuicelli says it's a huge morale boost that pays huge dividends for such a small price.
Brazil Is Just Weird!
Okay we're about ready to label Brazil just plain weird. First they had all these "virgins" auctioning themselves off but now bidding has reached over $100,000 in a bizarre auction for the chance to be the first to sleep with Brazil's first life-like sex doll. No kidding! Online sex shop Sexonico started the bidding war for the "virginity" of Valentina, the sex doll. The company insists that Valentina is no ordinary sex doll and has skin similar in texture to human skin. The highest bidder at the end of March will win a romantic night for two with the doll including a candlelit champagne dinner, an aromatic bath with rose petals, special lingerie for Valentina and a night in the presidential suite of a hotel. The package also includes all-expenses paid travel to and from Sao Paulo and a digital camera to film the "special evening." Because you know that's something you want to share with all your friends and family.